I'm sitting here typing this blog post, I should be studying. But because i'm sitting here typing this blog post i'll probably have to study into tomorrow. I'm tired of being in college. It's lost it's appeal. Call it senioritis, call it boredom, but i have just lost any and all care. I mean I don't even know if i want to go into the business world!! That's what i'm getting a degree in sooo shouldn't i be looking forward to that?? Is it bad that i'd just like to work ho-hum jobs for a few years and save up enough money to travel for a while and then settle down when i'm ready??? I only have this one life. I just don't want to see it become a desk job and an empty apartment at night. I mean i think i'm a fun person. I have a lot of travel i still want to do, i hope i get to go back to Paris but if i don't i still think it's in the cards for me to go off, to go explore some more. I guess what i'm getting at here is i am terrified of being normal. Is that weird? I long for the days when i can live in a cute little house with my cute husband and my cute babies running all over the place. But i'm only 22, and that is pretty far off in the distance. Can you work a serious business job and still travel the world? Can i work a serious business job and still have time to go off and see Tom and have him come see me? Obviously this is all just silly because i know the answer to all of this tomfoolery {no pun intended tom} ;) I need to trust in God more. I know that he'll lead me where i need to go as long as i keep putting one foot in front of the other. Now what seemed like a giant panic attack is only a small little worry that i need to toss behind me. I'll have an amazing life after college because we have an amazing God, i have an amazing family and an amazing Tom ;) I am tired, and a bit grumpy about college, but this blog was theraputic in itself. Making me realize it's not all as bad as it might seem.
I'm still planning on traveling the world. That will not be changing!
-Emily
Hey Em,
ReplyDeleteI can only share from my own experiences but what I have learned is that even the best plans can be disrupted or changed by life (and still end up being amazing in the end) and that its better to focus on the positive and less about the worry. There will always be worries and stresses. Focus on the love and the life.
I ended up being one of those students (again i didnt plan it this way) who met her husband at your university and we got married just a few months shy of my 21st birthday and was 22 when we had our first son. I say that to say that age is just a number, focus on what you know what you want and enjoy every day. Life is so short and so precious. I knew I wanted to move back to Europe where I grew up and told my (then bf) that when at HU and ten years after we first met we finally got over here. But we are here living the life we had wanted and sometimes the best things you have to wait for...just enjoy every moment.
Bonnie Rose | A Compass Rose
Thank you sweet friend!! I know everything will work out the way it needs to, i just need to control my controlling self ;) haha if that makes any sense!!! :)
Deletealas, my FAVORITE part about blogging... getting to vent it out and then realize it's all OK! Love you, sis!
ReplyDeleteIt really is the best part of blogging haha half way through a rant you realize....wow, i need to stop ;) You are the sweetest!! Thank you!! :)
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